Thoughts from a Cardiac Arrest Survivor
I wasn’t watching the football game last night, so I didn’t see Damar Hamil collapse on the field. I don’t intend to watch the video but even reading about it on Facebook and Twitter brought back memories I’d rather leave buried.
I’m coming up on the second anniversary of my own cardiac arrest experience. In my case, it was triggered by a massive heart attack, not a football hit. I don’t remember anything yet whenever something like this happens I relive my own experience.
I don’t relive the actual event. I remember nothing until I woke up in ICU a week later. Yet I relive it through the stories told me by those who watched me go through it and were themselves traumatized. I relive my cardiac arrest through a stab of survivor’s guilt. “Why am I still here and so many other worthy people have not survived?” Everytime I hear on the news that someone died of a cardiac arrest I think, “That could have been me.” So what happened to Damar Hamil last night is raw and real to me today.
My thoughts are still jumbled and the story is still unfolding. So from the perspective of one who has been there, here are a few thoughts and reflections about what happened to Damar Hamil:
- Where there’s life, there’s hope. We don’t know anything about his condition other than that he is stable, sedated, and ventilated. That’s probably all we will know for a few days. However, I’m living proof that people can survive this, and not only do they survive–they can recover. Pray for Damar and the medical team that is treating him.
- Damar’s family, teammates, and the first-responders who treated him also suffered a trauma. Pray for them in the coming hours, days, and weeks. My family went through a devastating emotional experience when I suffered my SCA. My trauma was different, but theirs was just as real.
- Do something positive. If you want to respond in a tangible way, consider doing something positive. One of the beautiful stories coming out of this is that a GoFundMe that Damar set up to raise $2,500 for a holiday toy drive in his hometown is now at 4 million dollars and counting.
Link to Damar’s GoFundMe: https://www.gofundme.com/f/mxksc-the-chasing-ms-foundation-community-toy-drive
- Please, please, please don’t speculate! Within minutes of Damar’s cardiac arrest people were on Twitter commenting that the incident had been caused by the COVID vaccine. Such speculation is ignorant and hurtful. It accomplishes nothing and does great harm to those impacted by it. Be better than that.
- Finally, take care of yourself. If you were watching the game and saw the incident play out live, you might be suffering from vicarious trauma. I posted a short piece by Caleb Wilde (Confessions of a Funeral Director) on my Facebook feed about vicarious trauma. If you’re struggling emotionally, you might find Caleb’s comments helpful.
Link: Vicarious Trauma